Not so great expectations
Sometimes we just have to let things go, the past, people, even our ideas of them. 'Expectations are the root of resentment’, thats true, but people misunderstand the meaning of this sentence. You having expectations from your life, of your future, of the you YOU want to be are great! They inspire, and keep you going, they create ambition in you that push you to put in the effort and do your best.
However, when we have expections from those around us, maybe to laugh at something, to speak to you in a certain way, to notice when something is wrong with your emotions, you try to hold them accountable for standards that they themselves are unaware of. You create a dependency between your emotions and theirs. 'Why are they acting like this?’, 'Dont they care about me?' are the questions you end up asking yourself. You become upset, based on an unrealistic, unrealised and un-spoken standard YOU created for someone else. Your sadness turns into frustration as it builds up--since anything bottled up and not released creates distress-- and we forget about what the other person may or may not be going through.
We forget that they are their own person, and THEIR actions are not governed by YOUR ideals. This may cause us to feel emotions such as guilt, discontent, or resentment; both, with them and ourselves. We can’t expect anything from anyone. We can’t depend on the stability of others' emotions to regulate our own. What we do for others has nothing to do with what they do for us.
Everyone has different ways of displaying their emotions, but it is not our job to sit and decide what they express and how.
Everything we want is within is, everything we desire is achievable, but maybe not from the source we think.
— Giaa-Marie Raj
P.S. — I feel like we’re all aware of this, just need to keep being reminded once in a while :) I do this too, but I guess the first step is always being self-aware and WANTING to create better habits for yourself, right? <3 Hang in there!
